He forgets I'm untenured

Every weekend, I do my lesson planning for the week ahead. It's extra time consuming because my principal wants me to submit my lesson plans on this special form. The form and the way it's set up is completely counter-intuitive and is in no way helpful in actually implementing my plans. If a substitute came in and was handed my week's lesson plans on the principal's form, she might say something like: "Oooh, that's a pretty form!! Now what should I do with the students?"

So, like most of the other teachers at my school, I end up having to make two sets of lesson plans: one to appease my principal, and one that I can actually follow. Double the work!

Ten minutes ago, I finished MY set of lesson plans. I was about to go to the computer and fill out the principal's set of plans when my husband suggested that instead of tediously filling out all those boxes, I just write: "See diploma. See resume"

Because I do know what I'm doing, after all.

Plan B: Quit

Remember when I said that no token system is going to stand against a chemical imbalance in the brain? 'Member? There is just no defense but to brace yourself against the wrath and fury that is sure to be unleashed when that One Student walks into class with murder in his eyes...

"Jose" is that One Student on my caseload. He's had trouble regulating his emotions since preschool and is frequently defiant (but maddeningly passive aggressive about it!), avoids any kind of work, is verbally and physically aggressive, and loves to engage adults in power struggles.

As far as I can tell, the staff that have worked with him have been great: documenting what goes on, involving the parent, enforcing consequences to the best of their ability, trying 101 strategies to find one that works, writing Behavior Plans and Functional Behavior Assessments up the wazoo, and calling the behavior specialists when they are out of ideas.

Unfortunately, the behavior specialist assigned to our school is less of a behavior specialist and more of a Professional-Documenter-and-Boss-of-the-World.

I had my first interaction with her last week and she was quite rude. She asked me what had been going on with Jose since the beginning of the year. I tried to tell her, but PDBW kept interrupting me to berate me for behavior documentation done last year that wasn't on the CORRECT FORM. Last year, you know, when I was in Michigan and not in this state. And the form!!! If we document on the incorrect form the world will stop turning!!!

After SEVERAL interruptions to my answer, I started to get pretty ticked. First of all, listen to the answer to your question, or don't ask the question in the first place! Secondly, I shouldn't have to feel defensive when I'm doing all the right things!

Trying my best to keep the anger out of my face, I succeeded in being respectfully assertive. I started with "LOOK..." then talked very quickly to get out what needed to be said.

I ended my mini-speech talking about appropriate placement: his primary disability is no longer his hearing impairment, it's his emotional impairment. She responded by saying that she didn't want to put him in a behavioral unit because he was just going to get worse.

And she may think that she has the authority to single-handedly decide the placement for a student, but she has another thing coming.

My plan? Document (on the CORRECT FORM) the heck out of every misbehavior, then call an IEP meeting where the IEP team will make a decision about Jose's placement in a behavioral unit based on our data.

If that doesn't work....

Good luck to me!!!

After weeks of looking, we finally settled on a dining room table we were happy with. Max spent lots of time putting it together for me... and now we can finally have people over for dinner!!

Here are some different views from which you can ooh and ahh over it:


Do you see those two shelves underneath? They're really to store stuff or display stuff, but our cats think it's a place for them to lounge! We've been zealous with the water spray bottle....

Anyways, I am lusting over FLOR rugs--I would really love to put one under the table to soften the space up a bit! But since we're trying to be careful with money right now, my best bet in getting one of these incredible rugs is to win one!

So I've entered two different "giveaways" in the hope that my comment will be randomly selected to win a free FLOR rug!! You can enter to win one of your very own here, and here!

Keep your fingers crossed!

Living Proof

Today was Junior Achievement Day at school. Local business people came from a nearby national bank to every classroom and did five to six activities designed to teach kids about how business works, etc. Teachers were told over the speaker system to sit in their classrooms and catch up on paperwork while the business people taught the class. It was an all day affair, and I'm sure for some of the business people, the Longest Day of Their Lives.

 

Watching them in action reminded me of the No Child Left Behind legislation that mandates that all teachers need to be "highly qualified" in their content area in order to teach it. So if you've been teaching science for twenty years, but you don't have the science endorsement on your teaching certificate, you must either get the endorsement or get another job. This has been causing headaches for special ed teachers at the high school level; suddenly you can't teach your students with severe learning disabilities in a self contained room all day unless you are endorsed for English, Science, Math, and Social Studies. And no one gets endorsed in each subject area! So there are some problems with this.

 

My BIGGEST beef is with the underlying principle of "highly qualified": it assumes that in order to be an effective teacher, you simply need to be an expert in your content area. When in reality (not that I recommend this) you just need to stay a chapter ahead of the kids. So... no, no, NO! A highly qualified teacher should be someone who can take any subject area and construct an engaging lesson, utilizing effective classroom management techniques; it should be someone who knows how to use assessment to drive instruction and is an expert in educational psychology and methodology.

 

My point was made painfully clear watching these very highly qualified business experts flounder in the classrooms. I don't care who you are or how smart you are, if you don't have a quiet signal, you're screwed!

Or maybe just a seatbelt

Throughout testing (a week of district testing last week and now a whole week of state testing--the TAKS -M- field test), my token economy continues to work its magic.

HOWEVER. I have found that it cannot overcome certain issues. I have one fourth grader who is severely ADHD (never seen anything like it in 4+ years of special ed!!). And though he loves those tokens and he loves buying stuff at my store, no amount of bribery can overcome a chemical imbalance like the one he had last Wednesday when grandma forgot to give him his meds.

In fact, every morning it's like a bit of a gamble. I think to myself: Is he on his meds today? Will he be, or won't he? And then at 7:55 when I go pick up my motley crew from the playground, I can tell immediately from a long way off what kind of day he's going to have. If he hasn't had his meds, he walks with a pronounced swagger and bobs his head up and down and calls out props to imaginary peeps. Meanwhile, the real "peeps" are usually avoiding him and telling him to STOP being SO annoying! But if he has had his meds, he walks like any regular little boy and is generally quieter and in control of himself.

Then some days he has had his medication, but just very recently and it hasn't started to take effect yet. On those days, this is my life:

see more Lolcats and funny pictures

And then I think to myself: does the Tie Chair come in a Size Fourth-Grade?

He's 9, not 517

All week we've been doing benchmark tests, which are a district assessment. Most of my kids get the test read aloud to them as an accommodation (except the reading test, of course), so it's been pretty tedious. This morning was the Social Studies' test. In Texas, like most other states to be sure, Social Studies gets kind of lost and forgotten during the day because of the rigorous demands of the Math and Language Arts curriculum. So I didn't exactly know how my kids would do.

 

Sure enough, the very first question said something like: "In 1492, Christopher Columbus set sail in search for: _______" and there were choices A, B, C, D. I read the question. I read the answers. Then one of my students raised his hand and, in total bewilderment, said: "But how do I know? This long time ago. I only born 2000 !!!!!!!!"

 

Yes, indeed. Maybe that one shouldn't count ...

A lesson in Economics

Well I can safely say that the new Token System.... works!!! I hope it will last and that blogging about it won't jinx anything, but so far so good ;).

I explained to the kids which behaviors get tokens. I pulled out each item from my store and made a huge deal about it (the students complied by oohing and ahhing). I added that they could save up for something big-- 200 points for an extra recess one day!-- or a movie at lunch! And each child promptly declared they were going to save up for something big.

And then for the next 2 hours that I had them they were total and complete angels. I mean, it was mind-blowing. I was like "who are you and what have you done with my awful, awful students?". I opened the store at 10:40 (right before they go back to their general ed classrooms) and gave them all an opportunity to spend their tokens--they had each gotten about 20-25.

Despite their good intentions of saving their tokens, they all broke down and bought something. Someone bought a miniature slinky. Someone bought a mechanical pencil. Someone bought a spinning top. "Brandon" was the one who bought the top. After I put the store away, Brandon was fingering his new toy while everyone packed up to go to their next class. He asked me: "What this do again?"

I spun the top around on the desk to show him. He watched it spin, looking at it doubtfully. Then he said: "Can I have my tokens back?"

Buyer's remorse! I had pity on him and gave him his tokens back. Within the next three minutes, my other kiddos wanted their tokens back too--I guess they changed their mind about saving for something big!

Forty dollar investment into my sanity

One of the reasons why I dread going to school in the morning is my fourth graders. That sounds awful, but it's true. I have a grand total of four of them that I pull out into my classroom for Language Arts every morning, then follow them back into their general ed. class to assist when needed until lunch. Here's a snapshot of what I deal with:

"Jose": Both Hearing Impaired and Emotionally Impaired. Very defiant but passively aggressively so... like you tell him not to do something and he'll do it anyway--as he looks at you and smiles. Can't move on after a real or imagined unfairness/insult/issue. Frequently tries to leave my room and walk off school grounds.

"Thomas": Both Hearing Impaired and Emotionally Impaired. Severe ADHD and is on meds. Unfortunately, these don't kick in until mid-morning. He goes from being uncontrollable to a total wallflower.

"Brandon": Hearing Impaired. Overly sensitive. As in he will completely shut down so that you can't get him to participate or even look at you for 20+ minutes all because you had the nerve to NOT call on him when he had his hand raised. Frequently bursts into tears over things like: "He didn't let me borrow his eraser"

"Martha": Hearing Impaired and Cerebral Palsy. No behavior issues here, she's just really low and needs a lot of attention and help to do any sort of task.

I have been through two behavior plans already that have clearly not worked. Both have been based on taking things away and losing privileges. But tomorrow I'm trying something new: The Token Economy. Anytime they show desired behavior, they will get a token. They will have a chance to spend their tokens every day or save up for something big. The ultimate plan is to phase out the tokens. I usually don't like behavior plans this involved, but I'm dealing with some, ahem, special kids here.

So I spent some of my weekend getting my "store" together:


Like it? I hope the kids will and that it won't take them long to buy into the system!

More signs

You know you're having a GOOD day when you can get through your whole morning and teach ALL of your lesson plans without any major incidents!! Yay!!

 

Also? The day before a three day weekend is automatically good anyways, no matter what happens :)

A sure sign

You know you're not having a particularly great day when you feel like JOINING your emotionally impaired student as he has his third meltdown of the morning.

The letter that should have come with my diploma

Dear New Teacher,

Congratulations! You are about to get (under)paid as you start your career and make a difference in the lives of students!

Here is your mission, should you choose to accept it: Teach the state standards and bring all students up to grade level while simultaneously preparing productive citizens for a competitive global society.

Your tools? Your student teaching experience, the best practices you learned at our fine institution, whatever resources you can find on the Internet, and the colleagues at your new school.

Keep in mind as you go about completing your mission that you will need to successfully navigate around the following pitfalls:

• Insufficient supplies
• Pressure from your administration, district, state, and nation to get your students to perform well on standardized tests
• Accountability paperwork. This includes turning in weekly lesson plans, writing IEP's, goal/objective tracking, behavior documentation and assessment reporting. If you thought you went into this for the kids, think again. Your job is to do the necessary paperwork to prove you are teaching the necessary skills.
• Lack of administrative support, and in some cases, respect
• Attending meeting after meeting and training after training. Some will be useful, most won't. In any case, wave bye-bye to your planning time!
• Thinking you can do it all while staying happy, healthy, and sane

Now that we have fulfilled our obligation to warn you of the potential danger of your mission, we can officially launch you into the Real World of Teaching.

Ready, set, GO!!!!

Hypotheses

Possible reasons why my principal charges STAFF members one whole dollar for the privilege of wearing jeans on Friday (payable each Friday, thank you very much):

1. To fund her new boat
   
2. To gather enough money for early retirement
3. Because what applies to students must surely apply to teachers as well
4. Starbucks
5. Because the staff doesn't deserve a break
6. To pay for secret cameras in each of our classrooms
7. Lunch money
8. Because it's funnier that way
   

Heard it through the grapevine

"Kate", my Deaf Ed. colleague who teaches Kindergarten across the hall from me shared this charming story:

She was teaching her students about the five senses (you know: seeing, hearing, touching, feeling, tasting). In an attempt to elicit from them the word "ear", she said:

 

"You see with your EYES, and you hear with your ..... ??"

 

All six of her students responded enthusiastically: "HEARING AIDS!!!"

Whining is inappropriate for #500

Wow. So this is my 500th post. Five hundred! That's a lot of pressure to come up with something fantastic to say on this momentous occasion. I really don't have anything extra special to say.

But do you know what was extra special about my day?

1. My one fourth grader took his meds this morning so class wasn't a train wreck! YAY!!!!!
2. I had a very important administrator drop by to observe me and my class this morning (unannounced). And I happened to be in the middle of a lesson that was semi-good and interactive; and due to number 1, I actually felt like I was in control of things!
3. I won two different online giveaways today: one for a piece of jewelry of my choice, and the other one was a gift card to "Ecostore" (green, non/toxic products for the body and home). So yay me!!
4. My wonderful husband is making dinner for us right now... yummm: stuffed peppers!

Hope all of you out there have had a good day too!

Rebel without a cause

I'm knee deep in a full day of district training and I'm writing this from the computer lab in the building during my lunch break.

 

This is not the engaging, useful, and relevant training that I have sometimes had the pleasure of attending. During those trainings I sit up and take notes and actively particpate. No, this one is squarely in the other category: mind-numbingly dull and mostly irrelevant training. During these trainings, I usually doodle, stare out the window, or brainstorm excuses of ways to get out of the training (so far, self-injury seems to be the most effective option).

 

I wasn't sure which type of training I was going to be attending today so I came prepared with copies of the teacher's edition of our reading curriculum and my plan book in order to do my lesson planning for next week. My only regret is that I didn't bring MORE work with me as I have finished all of next week's lesson planning and I still have a whole afternoon to fill as our lecturer drones on and on.... and on....

 

I used to be a conscientious and active participant in all meetings, even the boring ones. But this is my fifth year of teaching, and maybe something inside my brain just snapped. Because I refuse to waste any more of my precious time! I fulfilled my requirement of physically being there, and I'm not bothering anyone by discreetly scribbling in my lesson plans.

 

But I do feel like quite the naughty teacher. On Tuesday I went to a training from 4:30 to 8:00 PM about how to navigate our special education IEP software. As it turns out, it's a two part training, and the training that I specifically needed was in Part 2 (not meeting until November). Part one was... well.... let's just say that the presenter spent ONE WHOLE HOUR talking about how to log into the system. I kid you not!! When we had a short break at 6:30. I high-tailed it outta there. And I only spent about six minutes feeling guilty about it.

 

I was never a bad kid; I never went through anything close to a rebellious stage as a teenager; and I was the perfect model of responsibility in college. I guess I'm making up for all of that now!!

Now for my next magic trick

So I think it was a tie between a) being a good Christian, and d) peeing in her office.

Guess what people? The choice was made for me, and it is e) None of the above. Bulldog came to our staff meeting today to announce that she has taken a different position in the district and her last day at our school is Friday!!!!!!!

Now what else can I make disappear by venting on my blog.........

Dog Crap

If you are blessed enough to have a secretary / administrative assistant / office manager at your school who is both competent and helpful, GO EXPRESS YOUR GRATITUDE RIGHT NOW.

During the two years I taught in California and the two years I taught in Michigan, I did not realize how lucky I was to have office managers who made my life easy, not miserable.

But this time around? This time around, there's a bulldog guarding the school at the front office disguised as a young woman who can't seem to wear a shirt tall enough to hide her lacy black bra.

We've been in school for about three weeks, and the interactions I've had with her have been painful.

Week One: I'm looking for butcher paper to set up my room. Nobody thought to give the seven new teachers a tour of the school, so I'm hunting around for the work room on my own. I wander into the office to see if maybe the butcher paper can be found behind one of these three doors. I would ask Bulldog, but she's busy talking to someone and I don't want to interrupt her for something so trivial, so I cautiously open one of the doors. I had barely opened it a few inches when Bulldog interrupts her own conversation to yell my way: "Hey!! Don't you know that's the principal's office and SHE'S IN AN IMPORTANT MEETING??????" For effect, she looked at me like there was a good reason I was in Special Education. I retreated with my tail between my legs. Also, I was ticked.

Week Two: I'm trying to schedule an IEP meeting. I have to check with the principal to see when she's available as the presence of an administrator is required at IEPs. I go to the office to ask Bulldog (who's in charge of the principal's schedule) when she'll be available. She tells me to go ask her in an email. Okaaaayyyyyy... I ask her in an email which of two dates will work for the principal. She states "The principal will not be able to attend a meeting on either day as she has other obligations". Fine. I just email the IEP team and say "The IEP is scheduled for this day and time. The principal will not be able to attend as she has other obligations". I specifically wrote that so that Deaf Ed. administrators who are on the email recipient list will take the hint that one of them will need to come.

Little do I know that Bulldog is also on the recipient list. Next thing I know, Bulldog has sent one of my colleagues to watch my classroom (because yes I was in the middle of teaching) so that I can come to Her Office. I'm wondering what the emergency is (because HELLO I was in the middle of teaching) as I walk into her office. She is sitting behind her desk when she starts SCOLDING me for saying in an email that "the principal has other obligations". She says: "What I write to you in an email is confidential information. Telling colleagues that she can't come makes her look bad. In the future, don't repeat anything I write to you in an email"

And then she barked a lot, bit me on my neck and ran me off of her territory.

Week Three: I need copy paper. This is the only school I've worked at where you have to bring your own copy paper to make copies. I've run out of the two packages I had previously found laying around and had asked around where to get more. I was told that the office gives each teacher a box of paper per semester. I decide to email Bulldog instead of venturing into enemy territory. I politely ask her what the procedure is for getting more paper. She writes back:

"Ms.____, Please be advised that homeroom teachers get one box of paper per semester. All other support professionals are only to receive half a box per semester. Thank you."

That's great. WHERE'S MY PAPER???????

And lest you think that she has a personal beef against me, I overheard her chewing out my colleague (a first year teacher) for getting herself locked inside the building at six o'clock on a Thursday evening. There is no mention anywhere of the official opening and closing times of the building in the staff handbook.

I was talking to Max about this situation, and it seems I have a couple of options:

a) be the Christian I am supposed to be and take this unnecessary treatment patiently and graciously.
b) Say nothing out loud. Use the blog for venting.
c) Be more assertive when she is rude.
d) Mark my territory by peeing in her office.

So what'll it be?

This makes the school day TOO long!

Tonight is "Meet the teacher" night. So I took advantage of my twenty minute commute (which just seems insanely short compared to my one-hour commute in Michigan!) to come home and hang out before tonight's festivities. Also, I knew there was a puppy waiting for me at home who has been feeling quite under the weather lately and I wanted to make sure and check on him.

Well, he seems to have turned a corner because the second he heard me come in, he started whining excitedly. And then when he saw me? Oh boy. I think he must be feeling a little better because his tail was wagging so fast it was a blur. And then he kept jumping up and down in all of the excitement. Awwww... It will be sad when I have to put him back in his room behind the baby gate (don't quite trust the cats yet) for when I go back to school this evening--Max won't get home till after that.

I'll be interested to see exactly how many parents show up for this thing tonight. Once again I am teaching at a regional program for deaf students so most of them live quite far away. And I really won't be able to blame parents if they don't want to drive all that way just for a meet and greet. My prediction is that three or four sets of parents will come out of the fourteen that I have. We shall see!

The couch cushion covers are in the washing machine right now

On Wednesday, we brought home a puppy from the local animal shelter! He is half papillion and half toy fox terrier and his name is Barney. We actually had a difficult time naming him. We settled on Barney (actually short for Barnabas) because he reminds us of the Barnabas in the Bible who followed Paul around on all of his mission trips. Barney-the-puppy likes to follow us around wherever we go :). Also, Barnabas was an evangelist; and our little Barney is already making friends for us. Do you know how many strangers want to come up and talk to you when you are holding a darling puppy? Lots, as it turns out!

Anyways, you may be wondering how our three lovely cats have reacted to their new brother. I made sure to film their very first meeting (it's by no means thrilling, but I know some family members have asked!):



As of now, Mrs. Hufflepuff is the most tolerant of Barney, Mowgli is the most hissy and upset, and Gizmo.... Gizmo acts like she just wants to sniff him and get to know him but then she'll surprise us by biting down on his head or his tail very deliberately to see how he tastes. Naughty!

Right now Barney is not acting like himself. He's got "kennel cough" and he's feeling quite lethargic. Also, he's coughing, flinging snot everywhere, and puking. The good news is that the vet based at the animal shelter didn't charge us for all the medicine she gave us when I took him in yesterday. The bad news is that we're kind of sick of cleaning up his pee and his vomit!!

More pics when he's feeling better!

Untenured Teacher Gets Her Groove Back

Yesterday was a bad day.

They tell you to be prepared for those, and I certainly have had bad days in my previous four years as a teacher, but seriously. Yesterday was a VERY bad day.

It was the first day I was pulling out my four 4th graders for language arts in the morning, and my eight 5th graders in the afternoon. As I got ready to come to school, all I felt was dread. I had my carefully laid plans but had to think on my feet as I COULDN'T GET A WORD IN EDGEWISE when I was working with my four 4th graders. Turns out? One of the students hadn't taken his meds. My fifth graders were a much quieter and more pleasant bunch, but I was down in the dumps all day. Couldn't shake a (usually very foreign feeling) of HATING every aspect of my job as a teacher. I had lost my joy, my motivation, my creativity, my will to teach.

I started to think about all the other jobs that I could be good at. Anything to get me out of the classroom, please. I did one sigh after another, after another until it was time to punch out.

I'm not sure why I was feeling that way--maybe, new job in a new school in a new state with zero time to get used to it all before the kids showed up? I was worried it was more than just passing stress.... what if I was never happy teaching again?!!?

Max was so sweet--patiently listening to my list of complaints, assuring me that I'm a fantastic teacher. But I was still dreading coming back to school.

That evening I was reading Exodus 18 and 19 (making my way through the Old Testament these days) about how Aaron and Hur helped Moses keep his arms raised for the length of the battle against the Amalekites. And later how Moses' father-in-law Jethro came for a visit and showed him how to make his role as judge much easier.

And I fell asleep praying that God would send me some help.

I woke up this morning with my arms crossed (pouting in my sleep perhaps) and I dragged my sorry self to school. I had just taken about six steps past the front door when I was intercepted by a woman wearing a visitor badge.

She said (and this is a direct quote except for her name): "Hi, my name is Sally. Are you Sarah? I'm here to help you and support you in any way you need it!"

And then angels burst forth in song, and I totally burst out crying in relief and gave her a giant hug. Or I played it cool and just smiled as we walked to my classroom. Whatever.

She explained that while her official role was a diagnostician, she wanted to make sure that she was available to the new Deaf Ed. teachers to the building. She thought she had met us all, but it turns out she hadn't met me yet because I wasn't at the New Teacher Orientation.

She stayed in my classroom for about an hour as I worked with my fourth graders (now considerably subdued because Mr. HYPER had taken his meds this morning). She came up to me later in the day to shower me with compliments about my teaching style.

And that is how my prayers were answered. And I even feel like I'm getting my teacher-joy back!