Brace Yourselves

The fourth graders at school all set up shop in the gym for "Market day" as part of their economics unit. They each needed to create a product or provide a service to potential customers. All of us teachers got free money with which to shop around. I made a note to visit the "shop" of each of my resource room fourth graders.

Unfortunately, one was doing face painting, so later on I had to go to the grocery store with a giant smiley face on one cheek and a heart on the other. I got some stares.

One of my other fourth graders was doing palm reading. I thought this was quite ironic, as this is the fella with only one good eye (the other being a prosthetic). He had a bright light and a magnifying glass set up when I handed him my fake money. I don't believe in astrology or palm reading or any such nonsense, but I was very curious to hear what he would come up with because he had been studying the art of palm reading for quite some time.

He looked at my palm and declared that I would live a long life, that I was strong and healthy, and that I was very smart. I begged him to tell me how many kids I would have one day.

"Ummmm... See that line here? and here? That means you're going to have two kids", he said.

"Oh, that's perfect! Two is a great number" I gushed enthusiastically.

"OH NO!" he said quite suddenly.

"What? What's the matter?"

"I have bad news. I don't want to tell you"

"Please tell me" I begged him. "I can handle it!"

He leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms. "No," he said "It's too horrible"

"Really, you can tell me, I can take it! Puh-lease give me the bad news!!" I insisted.

Finally, he leaned forward and said: "See this line here?" [insert very tragic sounding voice] "that means your second child will die at 89!"

Good thing I was already sitting down...

The Benefits of Being a Favorite

Yesterday was my mid-year performance review. I sat down with the principal and the dean of student interventions (she's very involved with special ed). The dean said lots of nice things about me and my relationships with the other teachers, and about my interesting and engaging lessons. The principal asked me questions like "What's something that's going well for you this year?" That question surprised me a little and I didn't have an answer ready. When I took a minute to think, we all kind of laughed.... Then she asked me what I wanted to do better (easy... but hard to just pick one!). Then the principal asked me if there was anything I needed from her. At that point, there was some lightning quick censoring going on in my mind (I wanted to say something about giving professional respect), but I managed to say something both true and appropriate.

Right as I was about to leave her office, she asked me about my plans next year. Shoot! I was hoping to stay under the radar in that department for a bit longer. I told her that my husband was planning on going to seminary next year, but that whether or not I'd be looking for a new job was up in the air. Which is technically true, because there are some circumstances that I can envision where I would have to stay. But "up in the air" can mean 98% leaving and 2% staying, right???

In any case, both the principal and the dean expressed their wish that I would stay, but to let them know. The principal even volunteered to call up some schools that she's close to and put in a good word along the lines of "you can't live without this teacher in your building".

Nice, but I hope it doesn't come to that.... Also? Here's to hoping that I don't get on her bad side from now to June!!

A Belated Post about Tuesday

It was pretty awesome to watch the live inauguration speech on the projector in the school gym on Tuesday! All the kids were assembled and it was amusing to watch them clap when the crowd clapped. And soon? Soon, this is what my roll call will look like :)

Abridged for Your Sake

It's been a rough couple of days. There was a lot of drama today that was the result of some complicated events. I was too overwhelmed to even tell the hubby about it (you know, it's one of those stories that starts way back when two weeks ago, blah, blah, blah).

He cut me off at the beginning and told me to try to sum it up in two sentences. WHAT?! I told him that it was impossible, but he told me to try anyway, because "anything can be summed up in two sentences". After a few moments of reflection, I said: "One of my special ed. colleagues wasn't invited to a certain meeting and it hurt her feelings. It may have been partly my fault".

See? Not that hard. And I just saved all three of my readers a long boring story... so, you're welcome!

P.S: Max did end up listening to the whole long story anyways because he knows I need to talk--so yeah, he's pretty great!

P.P.S: Can you sum up your day in two sentences?

Invisible

Today was a staff in-service day. At the very beginning of the day, upon inspecting the agenda, I noticed that the administration had nicely differentiated the breakout sessions. One was for K-2 teachers, one was for 3-4 teachers, one was for 5-8 teachers, and one was for "specials" teachers (art, music, gym, spanish). In all three different breakout times, there was no mention of the special ed staff at all!

Rather than draw attention to our neglected selves, the other resource room teacher and I ducked away and spent a wonderful day flying under the radar. A lot of paperwork was done. A lot of internet was surfed. A productive start to the week!

Redeeming Herself

Our principal canceled school today (temps are exactly the same they were yesterday morning, when she didn't cancel... see previous post for how I felt about that!).

I guess the mob of angry teachers and angry parents wore her down!

Attempted Poetry: Angry Teacher Edition

The Cold Shoulder

It began with a wind chill
Of minus twenty-three
All the teachers thinking:
"Yippee!"
For surely, school will be closed.

We turned on the radio, the TV,
And the net
All the teachers thinking:
"What a sure bet!"
For surely, school will be closed.

Awaiting our cancellation
Turned to frustration
So many school closings
We all were supposing
That we would be next!

We're the county exception
To this freezing vacation
All the teachers re-thinking
Our job situation
For surely, this isn't fair.

Use your Noodle!

Today, our Speech-Language Pathologist (an "older" woman) was walking a second-grade boy down the hall back to his classroom. She noticed that one of his shoes was untied. She remarked: "You'd better tie your shoe or you might fall and bust your noodle". The boy gave her a quizzical look. She asked: "Don't you know what your noodle is?"

He confusingly pointed to his groin area in response...

Bored Out of My Gourd

I read an interesting article about how British school authorities are cracking down on "boring" teachers, blaming them for students' bad behavior. It led me to remember something that one of my education professors once said to me when I was in college: "The best thing you can do to manage your classroom is to plan interesting, engaging lessons". And while I agree with this statement, I do realize that it is impossible to make every single minute of every single lesson interesting and engaging to each of your different students. It's important for kids to learn how to cope with being bored, because sometimes in life you have to do things that are boring. At the same time, I will admit that I have sat in some teachers' classrooms (helping some mainstreamed student) and thought that if they had put in some extra thought and time, their lesson could have gone from average to superb!

So I guess I have mixed feelings on the subject.... What do you think about boring lessons causing bad behavior?

Sugar: The New Drug

On Tuesday's staff meeting, we were handed our school's official food and snack policy. The rule was made in September that kids could only bring healthy snacks to school. 'What constitutes "healthy" exactly?' you may wonder. Well, so did everyone else. So a committee was formed. Meetings were held. And this week, finally, we were handed an eleven page booklet complete with a table of contents. A table of contents! I laughed, but made the mistake of laughing next to one of the committee members.

Totally Unexpected

Our two hour delay due to icy conditions turned into a school closing right as I was about to leave the house!


more animals

Escape Artistry

Sometimes routine can be a good thing, but I will admit that I like it when things go differently during the day, or when something unexpected happens (AM I IN THE RIGHT JOB, OR WHAT??).

So I was a little amused when "Howie" (a first grader with high functioning autism) walked rather quickly into my classroom, and clambered into the tent. [Oh, did I mention that I keep a small tent in my room for kids who need some quiet time?] I was in the middle of teaching a small group of second graders, but I was concerned because Howie's one-on-one aide did not come into the room directly behind him. In my experience, a six-year-old-with-autism on the loose is never a good sign.

I poked my head in the tent.
"Howie.... Where is Mrs. G?"
"I don't know" he said, turning on a full dose of Howie-charm.
"Did you run away from her?"

As Howie shook his head "no", I could tell from his out-of-breath panting and his bright, wild eyes that this little charmer was L-Y-I-N-G to me.

Sure enough, Mrs. G comes in right on cue. We tried to talk him out of the tent, but when that didn't work, he had to be physically removed. We have a positive behavior plan in place for his occasional sprints down the school hallway. Needless to say, though, he didn't earn his reward today!

Happy New Year!

I haven't made a New Year's Resolution in years. Years! I usually think of resolutions in September, not January, and they usually sound something like: "I'm going to stay on top of my paperwork this year!", "I'm going to keep my desk clean this year!", "I'm going to plan ahead more this year!". For all of my good intentions, I usually drop the ball around October or November. Sad, but true.

But this Christmas, my little brother got me this. The pages inside are beautiful, each featuring a different, brightly colored, whimsical animal in the corner. I used to journal all the time before I discovered blogging. Since then, my commitment to pen and paper has been practically non-existent. I hope to change that in 2009! An actual resolution! Lots will be happening this year that I may or may not be comfortable writing about on this blog--things like moving to a different city, finding a new job, buying a house (hopefully!). It's going to be a big year.

But first things first! I need to go unpack...

Luxuries

My vacation is going by too fast! Oh no!

What I love best about vacation is breakfast and the morning hours. Consider: When I go in to work, I get up between 5 and 5:30 AM, scarf down a bowl of cereal in five minutes flat, sip my tea during my one hour commute, then stand in the FREEZING cold for twenty minutes as I do my parking lot duty at school.

BUT! When I'm on vacation, I can ignore my alarm clock, take forty minutes to prepare loose leaf tea and butter and jam on a bread roll, eat leisurely in front of the morning news (or cartoons, as the mood strikes me), and then surf the net in my pajamas.

Let's hope for a lot more snow days up ahead....

Until Now

We've been having lots of fun over here (my luggage did finally arrive on Christmas evening!!). We've been eating fantastic food:


We've been finding tiny doors in tiny villages:


We've been hiking around in the vineyards behind my parents' house:


Making all of the quiet, reserved French people stare at us while we laugh loudly and play with our cameras:


And trying to get Tiger to love us (to no avail... unless he's hungry!):

Merry Christmas and Joyeux Noel!

Even though I am still bag-less, we did manage to carry on most of our gifts. And Max came up with a genius idea for those gifts that are still lost in airport-land: print out pictures of the items, put them in an envelope, then wrap the envelope! So Christmas was saved after all!!

Next up, a yummy turkey dinner, followed by a movie night complete with popcorn...

The Grinch Who Stole Christmas

Here is the copy of the email I just sent to the Swissport Baggage Tracing Office (reference number changed for confidentiality purposes):

Hi,
I'm writing to check on the status of my missing bag. My name is Sarah and my file reference number is ZRHXX-55555. One of my bags has already been delivered. The other suitcase, the one with all of the Christmas presents in it, is still reported as missing according to the IVR system.

As it is Christmas Eve, I am very concerned about the location of the missing bag. Any information you have about its whereabouts, or when I can expect to receive it would be greatly appreciated.

Also, it's been five days since I've been able to change my clothes. At what point in time does the airline compensate me for my missing clothes and toiletries?

Thank you in advance for any help you can give me.
Sincerely,
Sarah

Here is what I really wanted to write:

Hi,

Delta couldn't possibly transfer our luggage from one plane to the other in the 24 hours they had to do so. Consequently, I've been wearing the same pants for the past five days in a row. You were so kind to deliver the useless bag to us this morning (my husband doesn't care about his clothes) after two and a half days of delay.
HOWEVER, WHERE IS MY SUITCASE WITH ALL THE LOOT IN IT? I'm tired of hearing that it's missing. You may be able to compensate me for my clothes--I have nothing against shopping sprees. BUT! The presents are kind of important, and certainly not replaceable in Europe, or in time for Christmas. And no check could cover my sadness on Christmas morning, knowing that half of my family members won't have anything to open from us. Because you know that Christmas is all about the presents, RIGHT??????

Get your butts in gear.

Sincerely,
Sarah

Finally Here!

It's been 13 months since I've seen my parents.

It's been 16 months since I've seen my kid brother.

My sister and her husband fly in tomorrow.

It's been TWO AND A HALF YEARS since the last time I set foot in my home in France.

Internet, I never want to leave again. I'm off to go eat some quiche and some cheese and bread. Au revoir!

Early Christmas Present

Yesterday was an interesting day. For once, I had no behavior issues to deal with (it's a Christmas MIRACLE!!). Then, everyone was abuzz with the very good possibility of a snow day for the next day. People were beyond hope. The imminent snow day was assumed. Teachers sent home snow pants and snow boots with the kids. Kids brought in their presents for their teachers. Everyone was saying "Merry Christmas and see you next year" at the end of the day. I was pretty sure the local weatherman would be flooded with hate mail if we didn't get our snow day.

Then, after school, we had our Christmas staff party. This year, instead of our district buying us a fancy three course meal and sending us home with 40 bucks each in gift cards, we decided to adopt six needy families that go to our school and make their Christmas merry! Our district gave us gift cards to spend on our families and we went out as grade levels and shopped till we dropped! It definitely felt more fulfilling than our usual self-indulgence. After the shopping, we came back to the gym and wrapped everything and sat down to a dinner of soup and salad. It was very fun!

And of course, as everyone assumed we'd be having a snow day today, people wished each other a Merry Christmas before we all drove home.

And I know that everyone breathed a sigh of relief (like I did), when we got an automated phone message from our principal, who said:

"Well, I don't know if it was the spoons under your pillow, the backwards pajamas, or if the stars aligned just right, but you've got your snow day! Have a great break and see you in January"

But it was a little hard to hear the specifics, because all I could hear was:

Crawl to the Finish

Today wasn't the greatest. In the words of one of my first graders with autism: "But I don't want to talk about this". Let's just say that the next two days will take pure endurance to get through. Pure. Endurance.

This version of "Ode to Joy" did make me feel a little better though, so I'll leave you on this note: