Timeline

7:49 AM
I come very close to being run over by a car in the school parking lot. Despite my orange vest, my giant stop sign, and my hand extended in the universal sign for stop, the man in the green mini-van looks right at me and keeps driving. If I hadn't stopped, I would have been hit... not to mention the two kids I was crossing.

7:51 AM
I chase down the man in the green mini-van and give him a vigorous tongue-lashing about the safety of students and staff during drop off times in the school parking lot. Also? I kick in his door to make a point. Also? This whole paragraph is made up, but part of me really wish it happened.

8:00 -- 11:06 AM
I sit through one loooooong special education meeting. I have a break in the middle where I get to see kids for a whopping twenty minutes!

Sometime in the ten o'clock hour
I am embarrassed in front of the district lady because my paperwork isn't in order (you wouldn't think it was a big deal, but it actually has legal implications). It isn't actually all of my fault, but I can't explain that to the district lady without sounding whiny.

2:55 PM
It's my planning time. Instead of planning, I am filling out a mandatory online survey about my job and my district. The first question is: "How satisfied are you with your job?" I freeze because I'm at a loss for words. I proceed to fill out the survey with very thoughtful answers. I even censor myself when there's a place for comments titled: "What can we do to improve?" [And by censoring, I mean that I wrote quite a biting paragraph but then erased it all when I reread it and it sounded like I was throwing a tantrum.]

3:40 PM
My computer betrays me and I lose the entire survey. I'll now have to retake it tomorrow.

4:27 PM
I'm in the middle of my 54 mile commute home and I suddenly realize that I feel very cranky. I can't figure out why.

6:12 PM
In my rush to get dinner, I open a low cabinet so fast and so hard, I fail to notice that Mrs. Hufflepuff (one of the cats) was right in front of it. When the door hit her face, she did a back flip and an angry meow. She is no longer speaking to me.

As I tell the kids who get in trouble.... "Don't worry. Tomorrow is a brand new day"

Caught ya!!

As part of our National Reading month, all of the teachers have been "asked" to call a certain number of kids during a certain time in the evening (once a week for three weeks). If we catch them reading, they are entered into a drawing for a bike or some such prize.

I just got off the phone with "Johnny" and his mom.

Me: "Hi, I'm calling to catch Johnny reading"

Mom: "Okay, here's Johnny"

Me: "Johnny, were you just reading?

At this point in the conversation, I can hear one of them say yes and one of them say no at the same time. I can't tell whose voice belongs to whom.

Me: "Hello?? So did I catch you reading?"

... [scuffle, scuffle]

Mom: "Sorry about that. No, he wasn't reading. He was just about to go play, and when you asked him your question over the phone, he grabbed the nearest DVD box and started reading from the back. Ha ha!"

Well, I guess I caught him doing something!

Forced to Resort to Raw Sugar and Espresso Beans

There are a lot of things that teachers do to keep their sanity within their classrooms. For some, it's making sure they get out of their rooms at some point throughout the day--escaping to the lounge, visiting a colleague, or lingering in the hallway for a brief conversation with another grown-up. For other teachers, it's just grabbing a few minutes of peace and quiet whenever possible. For me, it's surfing the internet for a few minutes before I get down to the business of my planning time.

For a lot of teachers, it's caffeine.

Many teachers purchase their own mini-refrigerators and coffee pots for their classrooms so they can have access to a fresh supply of caffeine at all times. Sure there's usually a fridge and a coffee pot in the lounge, but it's simply not feasible to leave the room every time you need a kick (or a refill!). So I'm sure some teachers are annoyed in Glendale, California when the local school district decided to ban personal coffee pots and refrigerators in an effort to save money.


see

On the other hand, is saving 60,000 dollars worth sacrificing teachers' personal comfort? I think that it's debatable. A lot of schools could use an extra sixty grand. But also, it's like I always say: A happy and healthy teacher is a more effective teacher.

How do you stay happy and healthy in your job?

Boundary Issues

When is enough enough?

 

As teachers, we are expected to help each of our students succeed. Many teachers are willing to go above and beyond the school day to tutor students after school, to help with homework, to head up a club, to provide extra curricular activities, to meet before and after school with parents, to participate in professional committees, to pay for supplies out of pocket, and the list goes on....

 

But then there are other expectations that maybe shouldn't be expectations at all. Call 14 students every week for the next three weeks from 6:30 to 7:00 P.M to "catch them reading" (in honor of reading month)? Attend the soup dinner in the school gym with your family (for no discernible purpose)? Host and attend "Reading night" from 6 to 7:30 PM? Attend fundraisers on a Saturday? Where do you draw the line?

 

My line is very clear: if it doesn't have a direct impact on my students' achievement, then I don't want to do it. Sometimes, I am pressured to do things anyway. But should I be?

 

Other professions seem to set their limits and live by them. You wouldn't expect a grocery store manager to ask all of his employees to stay for two hours after closing to help with inventory just because they should be committed to this establishment and to the customers that shop here. And you wouldn't expect a restaurant manager to require all of his employees to eat dinner there twice a week just because they should be committed to this establishment.

 

Some days I just think teachers are awesome because they are willing to do anything for their students. Other times, I think we are the biggest suckers out there for letting other people take advantage of our helpful nature. Three days ago, at a parent-teacher conference, the parents of my sixth grader with Down Syndrome asked her classroom teacher if she could babysit her this weekend! "Oh, you have plans with your daughters? That's okay, she can just go along with whatever you're doing!"

 

But maybe that's a post for another day....

Favorite Story Character Day

To kick off March as our Reading Month, students and staff were told to dress up as their favorite book character. This year, I forgot (again), so if anyone asked me who I was, I just stood on my tiptoes and said that I was "Sarah, Plain and Tall" (again). I saw lots of princesses and superheroes, Dr. Seuss characters, Junie B. Jones, Bob the Builder, Charlotte's web characters, and Wizard of Oz characters.

 

I've never really thought about who my favorite book character would be... It would be a difficult decision if I had to pick. I'd say it would be a toss up between Ramona and Molly Lou Mellon (from the recent classic "Stand Tall, Molly Lou Melon").

 

Who is your favorite book character from a children's book?

Can I Get a Clone?

I was slated to have a really easy day today because of Parent-Teacher Conferences. Usually I pop in on four or five throughout the day... one of the perks of being a resource room teacher, I guess.

I had two high priority items to check off my list (boss' orders!). But as soon as I stepped in the door, I had two teachers stop me with things they needed on a deadline. So there went my day. I was super busy running around all day, finding, printing, making materials, grading papers, popping in on conferences, and generally feeling bad about not getting to my "high priority" items.

But what's a girl to do? The answer may have included chocolate...

Looking Ahead

I've been spending a lot of time thinking about the future. We're moving to the other side of the state this summer, which means job hunting and house dreaming/hunting. Of course, it will be apartment living once more if I can't find another teaching job. This is a definite possibility in a city that is so over-flooded with teachers that even the substitutes and the paraprofessionals/aides all have their teaching certificates.

I spend my planning time compulsively checking remax.com and craigslist for places to live, and school district websites for places to work. The problem is, to get most jobs you have to know someone. I do know someone, but I don't know if there will be any positions there in the fall.

It's a bleak picture, but I'm trying not to give up faith!

Also? Four more weeks until Spring Break!!!!

And the Crowd Goes "Awwwww...."

You may remember "Leslie". Well, she proved her utter cuteness again with this darling letter she wrote to me:

I'm pretty sure that "cet" is "cute". Also? She signed it "Sincerely". Also? She signed it from me! Haha!! Have I mentioned lately how much I love being a teacher??

My New Boyfriend

I'd always heard about little kids having crushes on their teachers, but I've never been on the receiving end of it until recently. Recently, I added a first grader onto my caseload. He is extremely anxious, has zero self-confidence, and exhibits a lot of internalizing behaviors like hiding his head into his shirt. He's a bit hard to understand because he also has speech and language issues.

 

Anyway, I was concerned about transitioning him from the aide he was working with in the hall, to me and my office (anxiety about strangers was the issue). So last week, I made it a point to stop by every single day for five or ten minutes when he was working with his aide in the hall. Every single time, he was very shy and hesitant around me. But apparently on Friday he was telling his classroom teacher how excited he was to start with me on Monday (yesterday).

 

Also on Friday? He drew me a picture of a cat and a dog. He labeled them "cat" and "dog" (good thing too, because they look remarkably similar). At the end of the day, he gave me his favorite soccer pencil. I thought: "This is a good sign. Monday will be easy". And it was! He came out of his shell; he was chatty; he smiled a lot; he was highly cooperative. At the end of the day, he gave me a pink heart with a lot of letters on it. I could make out "like" and then my name. There were some other "words" there, and when I peeked at the sheet of paper his teacher had written on for him to copy, I realized he had written "I like you. I like your games."

 

Max better watch out... there's a new man in town, now!!

Crisis Averted... I Think

Well, the final decision about my Facebook Debacle of 2009: I've decided to accept her as a friend, but I chose to limit what she can and cannot see on my profile (I blocked my wall and my status updates from her).

IN THE FUTURE, all of you teachers out there who are afraid the same thing may happen to you: go to the "privacy setting" of your Facebook account. There will be section entitled "Block". Type in the name of your principal (or other people you don't want stalking you). That way, they can't search for you or find your Facebook profile in the first place. I wish I had known about this last week!!

Oh well.

A Regrettable Conundrum

My principal has "friended" me on Facebook. There is no link back to this blog from my facebook profile, but still.... what should I do???

A Crying Shame!

Issued by The National Weather Service
3:53 pm EST, Thu., Feb. 19, 2009

... WINTER STORM WATCH IN EFFECT FROM SATURDAY MORNING THROUGH SATURDAY EVENING...

A SNOW STORM COULD IMPACT THE REGION ON SATURDAY. SNOW IS FORECAST TO MOVE INTO THE AREA EARLY SATURDAY MORNING AND CONTINUE THROUGH THE DAY. SNOWFALL COULD BE HEAVY AT TIMES. SNOW ACCUMULATIONS IN EXCESS OF SIX INCHES ARE POSSIBLE.

This is what we in the business refer to as "wasted snow". As of January 5th, 2009, it is the number one cause of all pouting, ranting, hysterics, and general tantrum-throwing in our household...

I Like This Hidden Curriculum

Last Friday, I threw a party for a student. She's a sixth grader with Down Syndrome, and she was being rewarded because she did various things (mainly, following directions) to earn her enough marbles to fill her marble jar. She's been working toward this since about November, so it was a BIG deal.

Since it was such a big deal, I made sure I ordered in her favorite pizza, provided drinks and colorful decorations, and borrowed the plastic bowling pins and bowling ball from the P.E department. She was thrilled to invite her many teachers, as well as two friends from her regular ed. sixth grade class. I was eager to have a front row seat to see her interact with her regular ed. peers....

I know that her sixth grade teacher had been saying wonderful things about how accepting and friendly the 25 other students are towards her. I also know that the teacher herself has been a HUGE part of setting up that accepting and friendly classroom atmosphere. She handles situations beautifully in front of the other students when my student does odd things like lick her desk, or give that one boy in her class graphic love notes, or have a bathroom accident in class. This teacher has been WONDERFUL, and I'm so thankful for that.

Back to the two friends at the party (one boy, one girl). I was so incredibly impressed with how they interacted with her. They never condescended or talked down to her. They knew all the right questions to ask her in order to carry on somewhat of a conversation (she's not an eager talker). They smiled and ate and took turns bowling down the hallway with her.

It made my special ed. heart just melt! To think! Irregardless of your view on inclusion and mainstreaming, aside from what good it may or may not be doing for my special ed. kiddo, just think of all the life lessons her regular classmates are learning. Whether they know it or not, because of their sixth grade year with my student, they are going to be better prepared to handle someone who is different. They will know how to interact with people who look different or who act strangely. They are learning patience, acceptance, and kindness.

There are a lot of adults I know who could have used a sixth grade year like that!

Lists Are Your Friends

Are you a list person? I am definitely a list person. I like to have everything I need to do in one handy place so I don't have panic attacks thinking about it all (Have I forgotten anything? Where do I start?) My dad is the ultimate list person. On the phone today, my mom mentioned that he has been trying to get her to keep lists as well, but that making a list and looking at it is depressing!

So here is a list (ha!) of some handy tips for keeping your very own to-do list:

• Start with fun paper because it's more motivating that way. Short on cash? Print your own whimsical list paper here! (The tortoise and the hare are my favorite!)
  
• Add fun things to your list so that every item doesn't feel like a chore. For example, "eat some chocolate" or "waste ten minutes surfing the web" provides a nice break from all the humdrum.
  
• Make yourself feel better by adding in three or four items that you've already done! Nothing will motivate you to accomplish stuff like seeing the stuff you've already accomplished. Plus, it just feels good to check things off a list, even it's just "wake up".
• To avoid using your list as a dust collector, give yourself a deadline for checking three things off (any three except your fake ones like "eat chocolate"!). When you've met your deadline, REWARD YOURSELF! (More chocolate anyone?)
• Don't keep any more than two lists at any one time. If you have so many lists that you have to keep a list of your lists, than you've gone too far (yes, I'm talking about YOU, Rebekah!)
  

I hope I've inspired my five readers out there to keep lists. You'll be amazed at how it makes you feel. No more walking circles around your office feeling so overwhelmed you don't know where to start!

TGI (Almost) F

I'm so glad this week is wrapping up! My back has been bad, I've been congested, I've been near exhaustion during every waking moment, and I've had to stay at school late several days.

Also? I'm considering changing my job title from "special education teacher" to "professional meeting attender". Does anyone else think that EIGHT meetings in the span of TWO days is much too much? Don't I have to teach some kids at some point? On the other hand, I'm getting really good at sitting in my chair and nodding my head a lot...

I Want One Just Like Her

I have the cutest little girl ever on my caseload. She's in second grade, and I'll call her "Leslie". Leslie is so darling that there are days when I consider taking her home! Except for, you know, Max might object to suddenly having a seven-year-old around the house, and her mom and sisters might notice she's missing...

She surprised me the other day with her complete and utter innocence. We were playing a new game on the computer (Earobics); kind of a phonics thing. The pirate on the screen said: "Hey kids!". In the short pause that followed, Leslie answered "Hi!". I looked over at her and she was completely engrossed. I didn't think kids actually answered back when fictional characters talked to them (and now I realize that by saying that, I've betrayed the fact that I don't have any children of my own, or else I would have known better!). A little later, the pirate said: "Do YOU know all your letter sounds?". Leslie nodded enthusiastically and answered "Uh-huh!!". And so the fictional conversation continued.

By the end of it, I was so enamored with her charming display of innocence, it was all I could do to let her go back to her regular classroom!!

AchoooOOOOWWW!!

I'm not an athletic person. Sure, I took my share of basketball and tennis lessons, but I always found a reason to quit. I don't find strenuous activity pleasant whatsoever; my exercise routine consists of walking on the treadmill. Never jogging. Never running.

So I can't easily relate to people like my husband who have sported many injuries in many different places. But today? Today I finally felt like I knew what he goes through when he pulls something in his back. Unfortunately, I can't say that I hurt my back doing anything sportsy; it's a bit of a mystery: I just woke up this morning in a LOT of lower back pain!

I didn't realize how much I needed my back until I tried to do really hard things like: get in and out of a car, reach for a pen, sneeze, get up out of my chair, bend over...

I'm off to go get some ice...

Look at it This Way

There's this thing called "reframing". It basically means you reframe a (potentially negative) situation by looking at it in a different way... a more open-minded, positive, hopeful way. The idea is a bit more complicated and involved, but I've simplified it for the non-psychology people out there...

An example might be:

situation: We came back after a six week vacation to find all of our stuff and our apartment covered with mold.

reframed: Free shopping trip!!

I've found that I've been needing to reframe more and more these days at work... like this:

situation: I'm being micromanaged.

reframed: My superiors want to be involved!

situation: Stuff keeps coming up to prevent me from servicing my students. My instructional time has shrunk to almost non-existent with some students...

reframed: More opportunities for me to help the classroom teacher to differentiate!

situation: No potential snow days in the ten day forecast.
reframed: It's going to be SO warm!

situation: In-service day tomorrow and nobody thought to include any content relevant to the special ed. staff (again!)
reframed: An opportunity to slip under the radar and get paperwork done!

Yay!!

70 x 7

We've been having some drama in the special education department recently among our staff. Things were said. Feelings were hurt. The situation was quickly careening out of control. In an effort to smooth everything over, our Dean of Intervention called for a meeting with all parties involved (including me) at 7:00 this morning. She talked about what "teamwork" meant and got input from each of us about what we needed to be a better team for a certain student that we all service.

She told us at the meeting that we need to leave the past in the past and to start to move forward. I applaud her efforts to reconcile the people involved. But it was like I was telling Max yesterday: "No one will be able to move forward unless they can truly forgive each other. And you can't make people forgive each other".

Then two separate incidents with the administration happened later on today which made me angry. It seems I've been angry often this month at the injustices of the education system. So angry, it keeps me up at night! One incident involved another proof that the administration wants nothing to do with our special education kiddos and would rather sweep them out the door off to another school. The other incident involved something professionally disrespectful said to my face.

The disrespect happened ten minutes before the end of the day. I scowled all the way to my room and thought about how doggone angry I was and how sick I was of just everything. I got into my car and thought about how I was so angry, I couldn't even move on....

Wait, move on?? Wasn't I just talking about moving on and forgiveness? And all of a sudden my own words were haunting me and I realized that the hard thing to do was the right thing to do: to forgive the administration. [Thankfully, the Lord makes the impossible possible!!]

There is a lot that is wrong with the educational system. It is B-R-O-K-E-N. There are thousands of injustices that happen to teachers and to students every day. And sometimes, it's hard to see past our long lists of grievances. So much of a teacher's job ends up being trying to shield our students from all that crap. And when it feels personal, the best (and hardest!) thing to do is to try and forgive and move on.

And to keep on forgiving and moving on...

Brace Yourselves

The fourth graders at school all set up shop in the gym for "Market day" as part of their economics unit. They each needed to create a product or provide a service to potential customers. All of us teachers got free money with which to shop around. I made a note to visit the "shop" of each of my resource room fourth graders.

Unfortunately, one was doing face painting, so later on I had to go to the grocery store with a giant smiley face on one cheek and a heart on the other. I got some stares.

One of my other fourth graders was doing palm reading. I thought this was quite ironic, as this is the fella with only one good eye (the other being a prosthetic). He had a bright light and a magnifying glass set up when I handed him my fake money. I don't believe in astrology or palm reading or any such nonsense, but I was very curious to hear what he would come up with because he had been studying the art of palm reading for quite some time.

He looked at my palm and declared that I would live a long life, that I was strong and healthy, and that I was very smart. I begged him to tell me how many kids I would have one day.

"Ummmm... See that line here? and here? That means you're going to have two kids", he said.

"Oh, that's perfect! Two is a great number" I gushed enthusiastically.

"OH NO!" he said quite suddenly.

"What? What's the matter?"

"I have bad news. I don't want to tell you"

"Please tell me" I begged him. "I can handle it!"

He leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms. "No," he said "It's too horrible"

"Really, you can tell me, I can take it! Puh-lease give me the bad news!!" I insisted.

Finally, he leaned forward and said: "See this line here?" [insert very tragic sounding voice] "that means your second child will die at 89!"

Good thing I was already sitting down...

The Benefits of Being a Favorite

Yesterday was my mid-year performance review. I sat down with the principal and the dean of student interventions (she's very involved with special ed). The dean said lots of nice things about me and my relationships with the other teachers, and about my interesting and engaging lessons. The principal asked me questions like "What's something that's going well for you this year?" That question surprised me a little and I didn't have an answer ready. When I took a minute to think, we all kind of laughed.... Then she asked me what I wanted to do better (easy... but hard to just pick one!). Then the principal asked me if there was anything I needed from her. At that point, there was some lightning quick censoring going on in my mind (I wanted to say something about giving professional respect), but I managed to say something both true and appropriate.

Right as I was about to leave her office, she asked me about my plans next year. Shoot! I was hoping to stay under the radar in that department for a bit longer. I told her that my husband was planning on going to seminary next year, but that whether or not I'd be looking for a new job was up in the air. Which is technically true, because there are some circumstances that I can envision where I would have to stay. But "up in the air" can mean 98% leaving and 2% staying, right???

In any case, both the principal and the dean expressed their wish that I would stay, but to let them know. The principal even volunteered to call up some schools that she's close to and put in a good word along the lines of "you can't live without this teacher in your building".

Nice, but I hope it doesn't come to that.... Also? Here's to hoping that I don't get on her bad side from now to June!!

A Belated Post about Tuesday

It was pretty awesome to watch the live inauguration speech on the projector in the school gym on Tuesday! All the kids were assembled and it was amusing to watch them clap when the crowd clapped. And soon? Soon, this is what my roll call will look like :)

Abridged for Your Sake

It's been a rough couple of days. There was a lot of drama today that was the result of some complicated events. I was too overwhelmed to even tell the hubby about it (you know, it's one of those stories that starts way back when two weeks ago, blah, blah, blah).

He cut me off at the beginning and told me to try to sum it up in two sentences. WHAT?! I told him that it was impossible, but he told me to try anyway, because "anything can be summed up in two sentences". After a few moments of reflection, I said: "One of my special ed. colleagues wasn't invited to a certain meeting and it hurt her feelings. It may have been partly my fault".

See? Not that hard. And I just saved all three of my readers a long boring story... so, you're welcome!

P.S: Max did end up listening to the whole long story anyways because he knows I need to talk--so yeah, he's pretty great!

P.P.S: Can you sum up your day in two sentences?

Invisible

Today was a staff in-service day. At the very beginning of the day, upon inspecting the agenda, I noticed that the administration had nicely differentiated the breakout sessions. One was for K-2 teachers, one was for 3-4 teachers, one was for 5-8 teachers, and one was for "specials" teachers (art, music, gym, spanish). In all three different breakout times, there was no mention of the special ed staff at all!

Rather than draw attention to our neglected selves, the other resource room teacher and I ducked away and spent a wonderful day flying under the radar. A lot of paperwork was done. A lot of internet was surfed. A productive start to the week!

Redeeming Herself

Our principal canceled school today (temps are exactly the same they were yesterday morning, when she didn't cancel... see previous post for how I felt about that!).

I guess the mob of angry teachers and angry parents wore her down!

Attempted Poetry: Angry Teacher Edition

The Cold Shoulder

It began with a wind chill
Of minus twenty-three
All the teachers thinking:
"Yippee!"
For surely, school will be closed.

We turned on the radio, the TV,
And the net
All the teachers thinking:
"What a sure bet!"
For surely, school will be closed.

Awaiting our cancellation
Turned to frustration
So many school closings
We all were supposing
That we would be next!

We're the county exception
To this freezing vacation
All the teachers re-thinking
Our job situation
For surely, this isn't fair.

Use your Noodle!

Today, our Speech-Language Pathologist (an "older" woman) was walking a second-grade boy down the hall back to his classroom. She noticed that one of his shoes was untied. She remarked: "You'd better tie your shoe or you might fall and bust your noodle". The boy gave her a quizzical look. She asked: "Don't you know what your noodle is?"

He confusingly pointed to his groin area in response...

Bored Out of My Gourd

I read an interesting article about how British school authorities are cracking down on "boring" teachers, blaming them for students' bad behavior. It led me to remember something that one of my education professors once said to me when I was in college: "The best thing you can do to manage your classroom is to plan interesting, engaging lessons". And while I agree with this statement, I do realize that it is impossible to make every single minute of every single lesson interesting and engaging to each of your different students. It's important for kids to learn how to cope with being bored, because sometimes in life you have to do things that are boring. At the same time, I will admit that I have sat in some teachers' classrooms (helping some mainstreamed student) and thought that if they had put in some extra thought and time, their lesson could have gone from average to superb!

So I guess I have mixed feelings on the subject.... What do you think about boring lessons causing bad behavior?

Sugar: The New Drug

On Tuesday's staff meeting, we were handed our school's official food and snack policy. The rule was made in September that kids could only bring healthy snacks to school. 'What constitutes "healthy" exactly?' you may wonder. Well, so did everyone else. So a committee was formed. Meetings were held. And this week, finally, we were handed an eleven page booklet complete with a table of contents. A table of contents! I laughed, but made the mistake of laughing next to one of the committee members.

Totally Unexpected

Our two hour delay due to icy conditions turned into a school closing right as I was about to leave the house!


more animals

Escape Artistry

Sometimes routine can be a good thing, but I will admit that I like it when things go differently during the day, or when something unexpected happens (AM I IN THE RIGHT JOB, OR WHAT??).

So I was a little amused when "Howie" (a first grader with high functioning autism) walked rather quickly into my classroom, and clambered into the tent. [Oh, did I mention that I keep a small tent in my room for kids who need some quiet time?] I was in the middle of teaching a small group of second graders, but I was concerned because Howie's one-on-one aide did not come into the room directly behind him. In my experience, a six-year-old-with-autism on the loose is never a good sign.

I poked my head in the tent.
"Howie.... Where is Mrs. G?"
"I don't know" he said, turning on a full dose of Howie-charm.
"Did you run away from her?"

As Howie shook his head "no", I could tell from his out-of-breath panting and his bright, wild eyes that this little charmer was L-Y-I-N-G to me.

Sure enough, Mrs. G comes in right on cue. We tried to talk him out of the tent, but when that didn't work, he had to be physically removed. We have a positive behavior plan in place for his occasional sprints down the school hallway. Needless to say, though, he didn't earn his reward today!

Happy New Year!

I haven't made a New Year's Resolution in years. Years! I usually think of resolutions in September, not January, and they usually sound something like: "I'm going to stay on top of my paperwork this year!", "I'm going to keep my desk clean this year!", "I'm going to plan ahead more this year!". For all of my good intentions, I usually drop the ball around October or November. Sad, but true.

But this Christmas, my little brother got me this. The pages inside are beautiful, each featuring a different, brightly colored, whimsical animal in the corner. I used to journal all the time before I discovered blogging. Since then, my commitment to pen and paper has been practically non-existent. I hope to change that in 2009! An actual resolution! Lots will be happening this year that I may or may not be comfortable writing about on this blog--things like moving to a different city, finding a new job, buying a house (hopefully!). It's going to be a big year.

But first things first! I need to go unpack...

Luxuries

My vacation is going by too fast! Oh no!

What I love best about vacation is breakfast and the morning hours. Consider: When I go in to work, I get up between 5 and 5:30 AM, scarf down a bowl of cereal in five minutes flat, sip my tea during my one hour commute, then stand in the FREEZING cold for twenty minutes as I do my parking lot duty at school.

BUT! When I'm on vacation, I can ignore my alarm clock, take forty minutes to prepare loose leaf tea and butter and jam on a bread roll, eat leisurely in front of the morning news (or cartoons, as the mood strikes me), and then surf the net in my pajamas.

Let's hope for a lot more snow days up ahead....

Until Now

We've been having lots of fun over here (my luggage did finally arrive on Christmas evening!!). We've been eating fantastic food:


We've been finding tiny doors in tiny villages:


We've been hiking around in the vineyards behind my parents' house:


Making all of the quiet, reserved French people stare at us while we laugh loudly and play with our cameras:


And trying to get Tiger to love us (to no avail... unless he's hungry!):

Merry Christmas and Joyeux Noel!

Even though I am still bag-less, we did manage to carry on most of our gifts. And Max came up with a genius idea for those gifts that are still lost in airport-land: print out pictures of the items, put them in an envelope, then wrap the envelope! So Christmas was saved after all!!

Next up, a yummy turkey dinner, followed by a movie night complete with popcorn...

The Grinch Who Stole Christmas

Here is the copy of the email I just sent to the Swissport Baggage Tracing Office (reference number changed for confidentiality purposes):

Hi,
I'm writing to check on the status of my missing bag. My name is Sarah and my file reference number is ZRHXX-55555. One of my bags has already been delivered. The other suitcase, the one with all of the Christmas presents in it, is still reported as missing according to the IVR system.

As it is Christmas Eve, I am very concerned about the location of the missing bag. Any information you have about its whereabouts, or when I can expect to receive it would be greatly appreciated.

Also, it's been five days since I've been able to change my clothes. At what point in time does the airline compensate me for my missing clothes and toiletries?

Thank you in advance for any help you can give me.
Sincerely,
Sarah

Here is what I really wanted to write:

Hi,

Delta couldn't possibly transfer our luggage from one plane to the other in the 24 hours they had to do so. Consequently, I've been wearing the same pants for the past five days in a row. You were so kind to deliver the useless bag to us this morning (my husband doesn't care about his clothes) after two and a half days of delay.
HOWEVER, WHERE IS MY SUITCASE WITH ALL THE LOOT IN IT? I'm tired of hearing that it's missing. You may be able to compensate me for my clothes--I have nothing against shopping sprees. BUT! The presents are kind of important, and certainly not replaceable in Europe, or in time for Christmas. And no check could cover my sadness on Christmas morning, knowing that half of my family members won't have anything to open from us. Because you know that Christmas is all about the presents, RIGHT??????

Get your butts in gear.

Sincerely,
Sarah

Finally Here!

It's been 13 months since I've seen my parents.

It's been 16 months since I've seen my kid brother.

My sister and her husband fly in tomorrow.

It's been TWO AND A HALF YEARS since the last time I set foot in my home in France.

Internet, I never want to leave again. I'm off to go eat some quiche and some cheese and bread. Au revoir!

Early Christmas Present

Yesterday was an interesting day. For once, I had no behavior issues to deal with (it's a Christmas MIRACLE!!). Then, everyone was abuzz with the very good possibility of a snow day for the next day. People were beyond hope. The imminent snow day was assumed. Teachers sent home snow pants and snow boots with the kids. Kids brought in their presents for their teachers. Everyone was saying "Merry Christmas and see you next year" at the end of the day. I was pretty sure the local weatherman would be flooded with hate mail if we didn't get our snow day.

Then, after school, we had our Christmas staff party. This year, instead of our district buying us a fancy three course meal and sending us home with 40 bucks each in gift cards, we decided to adopt six needy families that go to our school and make their Christmas merry! Our district gave us gift cards to spend on our families and we went out as grade levels and shopped till we dropped! It definitely felt more fulfilling than our usual self-indulgence. After the shopping, we came back to the gym and wrapped everything and sat down to a dinner of soup and salad. It was very fun!

And of course, as everyone assumed we'd be having a snow day today, people wished each other a Merry Christmas before we all drove home.

And I know that everyone breathed a sigh of relief (like I did), when we got an automated phone message from our principal, who said:

"Well, I don't know if it was the spoons under your pillow, the backwards pajamas, or if the stars aligned just right, but you've got your snow day! Have a great break and see you in January"

But it was a little hard to hear the specifics, because all I could hear was:

Crawl to the Finish

Today wasn't the greatest. In the words of one of my first graders with autism: "But I don't want to talk about this". Let's just say that the next two days will take pure endurance to get through. Pure. Endurance.

This version of "Ode to Joy" did make me feel a little better though, so I'll leave you on this note:

Random Happenings

It has been a busy weekend. It'll be nice to get back to school and have chance to rest and relax and do nothing. Ha! Actually, that very well may be what happens in the latter part of this week because I don't see kids when they're on their field trips and having all of their Christmas fluff activities.

Max spent Saturday emptying all of our closets and even the junk under the bed to clean and de-clutter. I walked into the bedroom and stopped about twelve inches in because there was no more floor space. He told me: "Don't worry, it has to get worse to get better". I was skeptical, but he was right, and now we have a beautiful bedroom, office, and kitchen again.

While he was cleaning, I went to a cookie exchange... and now we have five days to eat sixty cookies. Can it be done? I guess we'll find out!

I'll be Home for Christmas

Well, yesterday was not a snow day for us. We did, however, get a two hour delay--meaning I had to be at school at 9:40 instead of 7:40. Unfortunately, I didn't get the call until 5:38 A.M... and by then I was already showered and dressed. So instead of crawling back into bed, I went out to breakfast (Dunkin Donuts!!!), did the week's grocery shopping, then vacuumed the house.

It's the most productive I've been all week. I can't seem to get motivated to do anything at work. I just count down the hours until the day is done. All of this Christmas anticipation is making time crawl by! Ten more days until I'm on a plane to visit my parents in France!! Until then, can I ignore school and be a couch potato, please?


see more puppies

Seven Random Facts

I'd say there's about a 20 percent chance that the freezing rain they're predicting for tonight is going to last long enough for a school cancellation tomorrow.

So, to take my mind off taming my soaring hopes, (but mostly because Sarah tagged me), here's a list of seven random facts about me:

1. I was TIME's Person of the Year in 2006. Seriously. Oh, and you were too, if you blogged during that year!

2. I once ate regular M&M's in the back of a moving car when I was about five, then I threw up. I haven't been able to eat them since then. Peanut M&M's, yes. Regular? Barf. My husband tells me there's a word in psychology for that (C.R.A.Z.Y)

3. Because I spent a lot of time growing up in France, I've had the opportunity to visit many other countries. Twenty-one, to be exact. Well, technically twenty -four, if you count those wimpy countries like Monaco, Vatican City, and Lichtenstein. I just wish I had paid better attention when I was younger, because I hardly remember half of them!

4. My mom tells me that I taught my younger brother how to read in English. I have absolutely no recollection of this but I'm considering adding it to my resume...

5. My family has a pet bird (an African Grey) who used to love me, but now hates me. I still have no idea what I did to antagonize her!

6. My first kiss was on my wedding day. Some people think this is cool. Some people think this is weird and/or ridiculous. It just depends who I'm talking to :).

7. I used to think that the gas cans you buy at the store already came filled with gas. This wasn't when I was little.... this was when I was nineteen!!

Well, I'll tag the following people, but if you blog and you happened across this fun little meme, feel free to steal it!

Roller coaster teacher
Teaching Bio
Miss Teacher

There's No Shame in Begging

Dear Mother Nature,

In looking at the ten day forecast, it seems unlikely that we will get a snow day this week. There's maybe a chance on Tuesday or Wednesday but it's too early to tell how great of a chance it is.

Here's the thing. I really, really, really need that snow day. Not just to sleep in, but to get stuff done, too! I didn't realize that I only had this weekend and next weekend to get the Christmas shopping and present making done before we hop on a plane to visit my parents for the holidays!

So if you could trouble yourself to dump a bunch of snow, ice, and strong winds right over my school, that would be MUCH appreciated. Or, if it's easier, you could send an electrical storm our way and make sure that the power is down at school... that would be just as acceptable.

I know you have lots of potential weapons of danger and destruction in your power. If you could just use some of that to ensure an extra day off this week (or the next; I'm not picky), I would be happily indebted to you.

Sincerely,
Sarah

PS: PLEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Maybe Next Time

Last night, sensing that there wasn't enough snow falling in order to produce a snow day, my body decided to take matters into its own hands, and made a rash decision to get sick in order to stay home.

First, it hurt to swallow. Then, my body started aching. Next, I only slept for a few hours last night as I lay in a pool of sweat, feeling nauseated. Finally, I started dry heaving after I woke up.

Checking the internet and realizing that my school would definitely be open today, I called my vice principal to tell her I was too sick to come into work today (that's our sick day procedure in our district) At 5:25 A.M, I had clearly woken her up.

VP: "What time is it?"
Me: "It's 5:25; I'm so sorry for waking you up!"
VP: "That's okay. I was really hoping we'd have a snow day today.... "

I'm disappointed too. It turns out that a sick day is MUCH less fun then a snow day!

Thankful

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

This year, I am very thankful that Thanksgiving has come late!! This means that there are only three more weeks until Christmas break instead of four! Woo hoo!

Also, my hopes are up for possible snow day tomorrow. We're supposed to get between six and eight inches in the next twenty four hours or so. I'll be throwing ice cubes in the toilet and wearing my pajamas inside out for good luck just in case :)

Ewwww.... Writing

I hate teaching writing. Every afternoon, from 1:30 to 2:10, I have three fourth-grade boys who I work with on their writing. I dread 1:30 with all of my heart. I find it to be so overwhelming tackling a student's rough draft... never mind trying to get them motivated to write something down!

You could almost say that the way I feel about teaching writing is the way Michael Scott feels about Toby Flenderson--especially the screaming part:



Today, my sixth grader with Down Syndrome pooped her pants at 1:25. I was giddy with excitement as I called the fourth grade teachers saying that I couldn't pull their kids for writing as I had to deal with an emergency situation.

That's right. I would much rather deal with poopy pants than poopy writing!!

Catspeak

How do you tell your cat that you are VERY SORRY that you accidentally closed her paw in the door (evoking a giant cat scream-yelp)?? I can't stand the reproachful looks anymore....

Yo Mama

Parents can be a strange breed. And I can say that with all confidence because a) I'm not a parent, and b) I've observed the same strangeness in my own parents!

When I was younger I got picked on. I wouldn't say I was bullied, but my diaries were filled with some mean thoughts about the unkindness of others. I remember telling my parents about how cruel some kids had been to me at school and my dad threatening to go over there and talk to them. One time, in second grade, my teacher slapped me across the face for correcting my work in pencil instead of black pen (don't worry, it was in France and they can get away with that kind of stuff over there). The next day, my dad came charging into the school yard, yelling in his newly-learned/broken French at my teacher. I think he managed the words "mean", "old lady" and "fired".

All of this to say that parents' protectiveness seems to come in many forms. Some students' parents do all that they can to get their kids into special education, to get them access to the services they need (or what the parents decide that they need). Some students' parents, as I've discovered today, do all that they can to keep their kids OUT of special education, regardless of whether their kids need the services or not.

I received a particularly angry/frustrated/defensive email this morning from a mother of a kindergartner who may qualify for special education services. There were entire words written in CAPITAL LETTERS, so I knew she was SERIOUS. The details of the letter aren't really important. What's important is that my heart kind of broke (or at least bent) for this mother. Irregardless of what I believe professionally, this woman's motivation was purely to protect her son from what she viewed to be a bad thing.

And I hope that my sympathy and understanding for her will put me in a better position to help her to see reason....

"I've Lost That Floaty Feeling"

As it turns out, waiting years and not months between dental visits is a bad idea. Stupid, really, because then you find out that you need all this work done, and then suddenly you're broke.

I was dreading today's visit to the dentist because they were putting in a crown. I wasn't exactly sure all that it entailed, but I figured if it was anything like my root canal a couple of years ago, then it wasn't going to be a walk in the park.

When I got comfortable in the chair, the dentist told me that she usually gives patients laughing gas in order to "take the edge off of this procedure". After she assured me that this was a freebie and that I wouldn't get billed for the extra "comfort", I told her to go ahead. I had never had laughing gas while awake before (when they took out my wisdom teeth when I was a teenager, they knocked me totally out), so I wasn't sure what to expect.

After about five minutes of breathing in and out of the nose cover, I asked the dentist what I should be feeling because I wasn't feeling any different than before the gas. "Oh", she said, "I guess you're not a lightweight when it comes to this stuff". So she increased the amount.

Then I spent the next hour feeling absolutely floaty, thinking about how much I loved everybody, especially Mrs. Dental Hygienist and Dr. Dentist. I had lots of warm, fuzzy feelings about my students, my family, this chair I was sitting in, and Thursdays in general. At one point I lifted my leg, but I stopped midair because I thought if I kept going I might kick the ceiling. I even thought of the perfect title if I ever write my autobiography. But mostly I felt like a pretty bubble, just floating along in the wind, totally unconcerned about everything and anything.

I totally get why people do drugs now! Not that I'll start doing drugs, but I will be counting down until my next dentist appointment! Ha!

Seated and Sated

Yup, those two words just about sum up my two-day conference. We sat a lot. We ate constantly. It was as if they were trying to distract us from the fact that most of our breakout sessions weren't very worthwhile.... at every chance they got, they shoved food at us (not that I'm complaining about the yummy food!)

The highlight of the conference was listening to the very entertaining and slightly irreverent W. James Popham, who had intelligent and helpful things to say about formative assessment. His dry wit was so hilarious; I was disappointed that they didn't let him talk more than an hour and a half!

Now if only I didn't have three more days of school to get through before I can catch up on some rest!!

Monday and Tuesday

Upcoming:

A two-day conference with hundreds of other teachers
A four-hour bus ride
Two nights at a posh, four-star hotel
Several free meals
Twelve hours of meetings

My prediction is that I'll have a great time socializing with colleagues, eating, and hanging out in my luxury hotel room but that the meetings will sour the experience! It's at times like these that I wish I had an iPhone or an iPod Touch so that I could more easily tune out the irrelevant content of the meetings. Although I don't know if I would have the guts to blatantly surf the net during a conference. Would you?

Football Fanatics

As we all know, fall is the season for football. Professional football takes over the T.V, and kids everywhere delight in flag football and touch football. At our school, the boys enjoy playing touch football during every recess that they can. One of my fourth graders really loves to play. He happens to have a prosthetic leg, and recently, he kicked the football so hard that his leg went flying across the field!! He was very matter-of-fact about the whole incident as he loudly announced to his teammates: "That's just another day in the life of a kid with a prosthetic leg!!"

I love that kids can be so resilient. He just put his leg back on and got back into the game!

And I'll be Inspector Gadget

Our school, like many schools around the country I'm sure, held mock elections. It's sweet too, because these young children are just parroting their parents when they talk about the presidential race. Apparently, they say that the person who wins the mock school elections ends up winning the real election, so I was interested to find out who our little students had elected.

As it turns out, our 2nd through 4th graders elected McCain, and our 5th through 8th graders elected Obama! So it's still up in the air I guess!

One of my kindergartners, this little guy, had to write a sentence about what he would do if he was president. When he was finished, he told his aide that in case he didn't become president, he wanted to sell "Krabby Patties" for a living--a la Spongebob Squarepants!

Election Day Should be a National Holiday

I had a fantastic weekend! It was very hard to think about going back to school. I considered calling in sick... but since I'm just coughing every so often, I didn't think it justified staying home.

I had a brief surge of hope around four this morning as I was awakened by a very loud thunderstorm. I thought: "If I have any luck at all, my school will get struck by lightning and the power outage will make us have to stay home". I even turned on my cell phone in case I got a call from the school. But the call never came. I pulled into the parking lot and my hopes were finally dashed as I spotted the lights on inside.

Is it too early for a snow day???

My Next Career will be Competitive Eating

So it seems that I may be eating too fast. I've recently had suspicions of this when I started noticing that I finish dinner before Max (sometimes WAY before) and he doesn't take much more food than I do.

I've attributed this to the fact that I have short lunches at school and must finish all of my food within a certain time frame. Because there are copies to run, phone calls to be made, emails to write, and kids to teach! Who has time to chew?

I guess this carries over to dinner time. Tonight, I ate an entire plate of food (spaghetti, green beans, and two pieces of garlic bread) in four minutes flat. I was really hungry, and also, there is Internet that must be searched, and TV that must be watched! I was aware that I was eating too fast because at one point, I flung spaghetti onto the floor and all over my pajamas. I told myself: "Sarah, slow down". But my body wouldn't listen. Just kept shoveling it in.

I guess I'll have to wait until school is out to be civilized...

Feeding my Childhood

My Saturdays are usually full of errands. Every once in a while, I have to do some very unpleasant errands--like today! I had to go to the doctor (after fasting all night and skipping breakfast) and I had to go get the car's oil changed (I HATE getting the oil changed). To cheer myself up, I decided that between my doctor's visit and the oil change, I would go get breakfast at Dunkin' Donuts.

It's been a while since I've been to Dunkin Donuts, even though I love that place. I'd say it's been at least four years. More than anything else, nothing says "America" to me like Dunkin Donuts. I remember that when I was very young, before my family moved to France, my dad would take me and my two siblings out to Dunkin Donuts on Saturday mornings so that my mom could sleep in. That's when my love of donuts began. And I'm picky! No other donut tastes as good... not Krispy Kreme, not Tim Hortons, not grocery-store bought. I craved them even more all the years we lived in France, since you couldn't find them there.

I remember when I was about nine or ten, my parents drove to Spain for a summer vacation. I hardly remember anything about Spain except that we found something very very close to donuts in Barcelona. That was a great day!

And when I was seventeen, my senior class took a class trip to Rome for a week (it's easy to do that when you go to an international high school in Germany). The same evening we visited the Trevi Fountain, some of us discovered that right around the corner was a Dunkin Donuts! In Europe!! What a treat! It generated so much excitement, that many of us ditched this scene:


for this scene:


It was the right choice to make...

Ups and Downs

I was going to have this long, philosophical post about how outrageous it is that the bottom line in special education is the Almighty Dollar, and how somebody should get out there and fix this broken, broken system.

But then making dinner tonight was like a comedy of errors with frozen chunks of food flying everywhere, wasted sauce (and time!), and shrimp that may have been too old.

So now, all I have the energy to say is that I won a radio contest on my commute home today (I was caller number one!). I got two free concert tickets to see Sara Bareilles next Thursday! Yay for me!!!

Productivity vs. Procrastination

Yesterday, I had a serious case of the Sunday Blues as I contemplated this upcoming week. Lots of MEAP testing, with some very uncomfortable parent meetings thrown into the mix (three, to be exact). Usually, I can handle all the meetings that come my way. But this time? This time, I don't know what to do/what to say/how to proceed. And that makes me anxious. Also? I knew I would be coming back to pile of paperwork to take care of. Paperwork that I didn't want to deal with.

And today wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be. There are a few reasons for this: 1) I'm repressing all thoughts of my upcoming meetings; and 2) some absent kids and some other circumstances gave me a free two hours in my afternoon. Now a responsible person would have used that time to tackle all of that paperwork. But not me. No, I decided that the more fun thing to do would be to watch some music videos online, to do some house shopping on craigslist, and to generally putz around my office. Maybe if I walked at the office, I would be more productive!

My Thoughts Exactly

It's all about MEAP these days. MEAP is Michigan's standardized test that all third through eighth graders must take. Most of my special education students have accommodations such as taking it in a small/quiet setting, or having the questions read aloud. Let me tell you, it is VERY painful watching them take this test. I so very much want to help them, but I can't! One boy asked: "Why does Michigan want us to do this test? I don't like it at all!" What I wanted to say was "Yeah, I know, right? It sucks!!!", but all I could do was nod sympathetically...

Monday Merriment

Parent-teacher conference day is definitely a day to look forward to if you work at a school and are not a classroom teacher. While all of my friends were holding back-to-back meetings, I attended five conferences (a total of an hour of my time) and had the rest of the day to myself.

Although I got A LOT done, I managed to sleep in for an extra half hour and take a forty-five minute lunch! If only every Monday could be so easy!

Spelling Successes

If you ever wonder why kids struggle so much with spelling, take a look at this poem.

There are five students to whom I give modified spelling lists. Today was the first test for three of my second graders. I've designed this system where, for every perfect spelling test (one error is permitted because I'm too nice), they get to move their little paper person up one rung of a construction paper ladder. The whole set-up is on my bulletin board titled "stepping up". I've told the kids that there will be some sort of surprise or celebration once they reach the top of their ladders (each one has five rungs).

All three kiddos were SO excited to take their tests today. And (FORTUNATELY) they all passed with flying colors. Their excitement was evident as they moved their person up their ladder: they were clapping, jumping up and down, and generally beaming!

If you're wondering why I consider this a big enough deal to share with the internet, it's because, for all three of these kids, school is generally too difficult, too frustrating, and generally overwhelming. Today, they were able to experience a real sense of success and accomplishment; and, because of it, I now feel the same way!! [Insert clapping, jumping up and down, and beaming!!]

With or Without You

Teacher School Supplies I Can't Live Without:

1. Post-it notes
2. Electric stapler
3. Laminator
4. Sharpies
5. Secret candy stash
   

What can't you live without?

Stress Test

Last Friday, our staff had a whole day of in-service. For part of the meeting, all the teachers were asked to log into the computers in the computer lab and take the district math test that the kids are asked to take at the beginning of the year. We take our district tests through NWEA. They're all computerized and they're all a little like the GRE: the more questions you get right, the harder the questions become; the more questions you get wrong, the easier they become.

The reason we were asked to do this is because all of us teachers are getting trained this year in mathematics content knowledge, in order to become better math teachers. So we were asked/told to take the test, then after all of our training, we'll take it again at the end of the year to see how much progress we've made.

Now. We were given the "sixth grade and up" version of the test. This doesn't mean they'll only give you middle school math questions. Remember, the more you get right, the harder they become. I was a little nervous about the test, only because it's been eight years since I've had a real math class. But I generally like taking tests (I know, I'm a nerd) and hoped that by my supreme math skills I would be able to show it who was boss.

In reality, it took me one hour and twenty minutes to answer fifty-two questions (and I had to take a shot in the dark on some of them) and I felt very humbled as I noticed the test items getting easier at one point. I was worried that I was going to start seeing questions like "1 + 1".

As it turns out, a lot of teachers were nervous about taking this test. I hope it will make us all more empathetic to our own students' test anxiety!

Art of Doing Nothing

It's 9:40 AM and I've been lazing around on the couch for about three hours now, alternating between watching Jack Hanna's Animal Adventures, and surfing the internet. I'm working up the strength to vacuum. Also? I think I may need a second breakfast to hold me over till lunch.

On the agenda for today: shower, more lounging around, watch a movie (maybe Sleeping Beauty), go to Costco with the hubby. The only time Max gets excited about shopping is when we go to Costco. Something about buying in bulk (getting the best deal), and lots of electronics, and free food samples must appeal to him somehow. Oh, and they have amazing pizza and frozen yogurt at their restaurant.

I'm planning on printing off some scenic pictures Max has taken over the past few years to frame for our stairwell. Maybe that will be tomorrow's project since I will be so busy relaxing today :)

Telling it like it is

If your principal is going to give the entire special education department the ultimatum that all IEP meetings will be held 4-6 weeks in advance, then gives you the exact dates that they are to be held ("Parents can't make it? Too bad!") so that she can be there, she had better DARN WELL SHOW UP!!

Please excuse my frustration. This decision that she has made has had monumental consequences. Since we have no flexibility to space out our IEP's, I have to schedule them back to back (up to five a day). That means the hours of testing the kids and writing up the paperwork is taking precedence over actually seeing the kids we were meant to help on a daily basis. Which is hurting my working relationships with general education teachers. Also? It's hurting the kids. OH YEAH. THE KIDS. So we basically dropped everything because of this decision she made so that she could be at our meetings... and this week, she has missed four out of five!

All of us special ed. staff are walking around in such a state of stress. One of my colleagues is talking about quitting mid-year. I hope our principal isn't shocked next fall when she finds that she has to replace an entire department.....

Maybe I'll post something more uplifting when I get some rest this weekend!

A Race I Can't Win

Every late afternoon/evening, I play a game called "Beat the clock". It basically involves leaving work as soon as is humanly possible. But there's a catch! I have a one hour commute and if I don't leave before 4, I'll hit traffic. If I leave between 4:05 and 4:25, I hit big time traffic. If I leave between 4:25 and 4:40, I hit some mild traffic. After 4:40, I hit no traffic, but then I just get home late because I left late.

And all I'm trying to do is win this game by maximizing the amount of time I can spend relaxing at home before I have to go to sleep and start all over again!

So the best case scenario is I wrap up the day's work and leave before four. But the game isn't over yet; it has just begun. If I leave at four, I get home at five. That leaves four hours until bedtime. (Bedtime is non-negotiable.) So I race around the house doing some light chores, cooking dinner, eating dinner, cleaning up after dinner, and walking on the treadmill. If I'm lucky, I can squeeze 2.5 hours of fun time before bed. Realistically, it's more like two hours. And that time always seems to fly right by!

If someone could just give me a "pause" button for this thing called Life, I would be much obliged!

Taking Over the World

Instead of posting about my annoyingly long day, I thought I would share another recipe with you. I make these Make-Ahead Lunch Wraps in big batches on the weekend. I wrap them in plastic wrap and they are good for up to three months in the freezer. Short on time? Can't think of what to pack for lunch? Simple! Grab a wrap! All it needs is two or three minutes in the microwave! It has totally revolutionized my school lunches. And my school lunches needed revolutionizing because I don't do sandwiches. It used to be leftovers from the night before or crackers and cheese. But now with my wraps, I can eat something quick, healthy, and filling!

In fact, other teachers in the lounge have noticed my lunch wraps and have requested the recipe. Since they have started bringing wraps to school, others are noticing so it continues to spread. Soon, my plan for lunchroom domination will be complete! Moohahaha (evil laugh)!

What do you pack for lunch?

Leaving My Mark

This morning, Mrs. Hufflepuff (one of our three cats) left her mark on the kitchen counter by way of a gigantic hairball--complete with splatter against the wall.

This afternoon, our dean of curriculum and instruction told me that I had already left quite a mark on our school after not even a full year of being there. He wanted to thank me for starting up and implementing two school-wide curriculum (Rocket Math and Read Naturally). That was a nice bit of encouragement!

Messy mark = bad
Resourceful mark = good

Can't Make This Stuff Up

Do you remember this kiddo, a six-year old first grader with high-functioning autism? He is making great gains in being able to stay in the mainstream. We are lucky to have an aide whose specialty is working herself out of a job as she teaches her student to function independently in the classroom.

Even though he's been doing so much better, there are still times when he becomes overwhelmed by certain activities. And even though he is very verbal, he has a funny way of communicating his frustration (we're working on it). Like yesterday, when he had had enough of doing his writing assignment and his aide continued to keep him on task....

Kiddo says to aide: "I wish you had NEVER given birth to me!!!!!"

Aide: "Oh, hon, I didn't give birth to you; your mommy did!"

Kiddo (said matter-of-factly): "You are getting on my last nerve. I'm going home"
[He then proceeded to make a beeline for the door]

Needless to say, our aides wear tennis shoes to work!

Hooray for Today!

So today was my first good day of the school year. And it's no coincidence that my first good day was also my first normal day where I was able to stick to my regular routine.

I am a creature of habit by nature. I have a routine for going to bed, for getting up, for eating breakfast, and for doing chores. I have a vacation routine and a work routine. I like my routines. They help me to be a happy, healthy person. It doesn't matter that Max makes fun of me for always ordering the chicken quesadilla when we go to Applebees. I don't care if people think I'm weird for having the exact same breakfast in the morning. I have to do what works for me!

And today, pulling kids at their regular time to work on the regular stuff... well, that just made my whole universe fall into place. I finally felt grounded; I knew what to expect and when. All my perfect little ducks lined up in a row. Happy, happy, happy!

I know my universe will start to spin too fast again and my ducks will step out of line later on this week. (Tomorrow, I can't even see any kids because I have IEP meetings all day.) But for now, I'm going to savor the normalcy. Yummm--it tastes like chocolate....

Everyone Learns

Thank you all for your encouraging comments in my previous post! That boost was just what I needed! In looking at my school calendar, it looks like the light at the end of my tunnel will be Oct. 31st. Then things will slow down to just normal stress, not scary-stress (get it? scary? Halloween? Ha!) Today, I thought I would share an anecdote with you.

I was standing in line with "Mason" (not his real name) and the rest of his first grade class for hot lunch. Mason is new to us this year and he has Aspergers. His one-on-one aide was not there on Friday and the substitute we had contacted decided not to show at the last minute. So I had to e-mail all the teachers of the kids I work with and inform them of the emergency situation and apologize for not being able to pull their kids for services that day (so I could sub for Mason's aide).

The most interesting part of Friday was in the lunch line. A little boy right in front of Mason and me (I'll call him Herb), turned and looked at Mason and said very sweetly: "Hi, Mason, my name is Herb. Can you say 'Herb'?" Mason just ignored him. I hung back and decided to let this play out as a spectator.

Herb tried again. "Hey, Mason, our teacher is "Ms. Fox"; can you say 'Ms. Fox'?" Mason can actually say quite a lot of things but was getting tired of this conversation, so he said in a rather bored way "Ms. Fox".

Well Herb was very excited about his progress. He looked me directly in the eyes, pumped both of his little fists up in victory and shouted: "HE LEARNS!"

And I Mean This Reflectively, not Negatively...

About one year ago, I was praying that the Lord would give me a teaching position where I could "do the most good". I didn't ask to be in a school where everyone collaborated and got along swimmingly. I didn't ask to be in a school led by an amazing administration. I didn't ask for a supportive staff or principal. I was pretty specific in wanting a situation where my gifts and talents could fill a need.

That's why I shouldn't be so surprised when I look around me and realize that my school is a pretty toxic environment in which to work. My only question is.... what, what, WHAT can I possibly do to change it?

Because--bottom line--it would make me feel a lot better about being there if I knew that there was a specific, eternally significant reason to be there. And... maybe if I thought about it long and hard, I might be able to think of some reasons; but right now, I'd just like this year to be over so I can move on to a different school.

Chomping at the Bit

It's simple, really. All I want is to give my kids the services they need, to collaborate with their teachers, and to keep their parents involved. It's really not that complicated.

So why isn't this happening? I'll give you the short list:

1. Two weeks of district testing cause me to spend all of my time accommodating for special needs students (translation, I read tests out loud all day instead of servicing my students)
2. Principal decides that paperwork should be our priority, not the kids. This means keeping services to the absolute minimum to allow time for paperwork... if it says that kid X needs four to six hours in the resource room, I pull him four, not six.
3. Principal schedules special education meetings once a week during the school day that last for TWO HOURS.

We've begun the third week of school and I have yet to start servicing my kids. Teachers are bugging me about it; parents are bugging me about it; my kiddos catch me in the hallway and ask when they get to come see me!

I would me a much more effective and well-adjusted teacher if I could just go and do my job in peace...

Wynken, Blynken, and Nod

Hello world. It's 7:30 AM right now and I've been up and out of bed for nearly an hour this Saturday morning as a part of my sleep experiment. It's been seven whole days that I've been doing this and, I have to admit, I'm sold on the concept! Granted, it is extremely unpleasant to hear the alarm go off that early on the weekend, but I've noticed some definite changes during the work week:

1. It's so much easier and quicker to fall asleep.
2. I still get a little tired during the day, but nowhere near the exhaustion I used to feel when I was afraid to prolong a blink in fear of falling asleep on my desk!
3. My Friday evening commute home is no longer a dangerous flirtation with death. I used to have to fight to keep my eyes open and to stay on the road. Not so anymore! Even when I stay at school until 6:30 at the end of a long and stressful week, I'm very much awake as I drive home!!
4. My weekends feel L-O-N-G.

Now, the sleep research also says that you shouldn't eat food or watch T.V in the two hours prior to going to bed. But.... you have to draw the line somewhere, people!

B is for Busy

This morning, I got an email from my new Resource Room colleague... she wrote in passing: "You're the busiest person I know." After I wrote her back and told her to interrupt me at any time should she need help or advice with anything, I got to thinking.

If there was an award for "the busiest person ever" and it came with say, one million dollars, this is what I would do:
First, I would hire a secretary to handle all of my paperwork, keep track of my meetings (or better yet, just go to my meetings!), and schedule kids. This would allow me to actually focus on teaching my students.
Then, I would hire a chef, a housekeeper, and a personal shopper to cater to my every whim. This would allow me to come home and crash on the couch!

Or... maybe I would just retire and live off the cash.... Hm.

"Chew Food Not People"

This, of course, is good advice for everyone, but it is especially good advice for a certain six-year-old boy with autism who I happen to work with.

The advice (well, it was more like a direction) was given to him by our assistant principal after he had bitten his aide on the arm twice. When we brought him to her office, he was screaming at the top of his lungs that we "don't call dad!!" Screaming and sobbing. When we were finally able to calm him down, our AP told him in plain and simple terms that teeth were for chewing food, not people, and that if he made that choice again, we would be calling dad. When we were sure that he understood the rules and the consequences, we sent him back to class with his long-suffering aide.

About an hour later, I'm walking out of the lounge towards my classroom when I notice our social worker RUNNING down the hall to my room. Never a good sign. It means a kid is having some sort of fit or meltdown, or timeout. It was my little guy again. He had bit his aide again! This time the regular ed teacher and the aide brought him to the office. We called his dad while he was half screaming, half crying, and curled up in a ball against his teachers' chest.

When the aide hung up the phone, she started to discuss with the kiddo what his dad had said. He didn't want to hear any of it, so he flattened himself out like a board (laying across his teacher's lap), closed his eyes, crossed his arms in the shape of an X across his chest, and stuck out his tongue. He was literally playing dead. The sheer unexpectedness of this action (in all of its six-year-old wisdom and logic) was enough to make each of us turn away from him and laugh into our sleeves.

Must... keep... a straight face... for discipline....

Sleep Experiment

After feeling continuously tired and having so many problems falling asleep and staying asleep, my husband has convinced me to try to sleep the way the research says we should sleep: go to bed and wake up at the same time every day (or within an hour of the same time every day). For me, that means going to bed around 10 and getting up before 7 ON THE WEEKENDS! A little part of me died just typing that.

So we've been trying it out this weekend and we're going to stick with our plan for the next couple of weeks and see if we become more rested and less cranky individuals. Wish us luck!

Think Happy Thoughts

I worked a thirteen hour day (okay, eleven hours with two hours total of commute) and brought work home with me. But the good news is that I get to do my work on our brand new laptop! Yay for new toys!

Stretch Marks

Imagine a rubber band. Imagine seventeen different people pulling at different points on the rubber band. That's how I feel this week. Pretty soon, if someone's not careful, this rubber band is going to snap and poke someone in the eye....

My body knew I was way stressed out before my mind caught up with it. It's been giving me clues like sleeplessness and tummy aches and head aches after lunch. This morning right after our first IEP team meeting with the principal (which lasted 2 hours and forty-five minutes!!), two of my colleagues told me I looked like a volcano trying not to erupt--and this after much prayer on my commute for peace and calmness!!

So my task is this: to LET GO of the things that are out of my control; and to stay late after school to accomplish all that I can. This means training my brain to somehow stop worrying about what I can't change. This means sacrificing more personal time on weekdays at least until mid-October. Also, this means sleep..... If only I could push a "standby" button and sleep....

A Matter of Perspective

I knew today would be a little rough, because over the weekend, one of our one-on-one aides resigned. She was assigned to a mainstreamed sixth grader who has Down Syndrome. Until we can find someone new, I'm in charge of making sure she participates, follows directions, and does her work. She can be difficult to work with.

I had a busy day, bouncing between my sixth grader and two first graders who need a lot of support. Add to the mix a few teachers who need me to get down to their classrooms because they are seeing major red flags in some new students, and I felt a bit stretched.

I think it was overall a good day, aside from my sixth grader pooping her pants in the afternoon.

But at least a kindergartner didn't pee on my bare arm from the top of the playground slide. My general ed. colleague can't say as much. So I guess it can always be worse!!!

Last Craft of the Summer

There is no better way to start the school year than with chocolate. That's why, when I saw these instructions for Hershey's Nugget boxes, I just had to make them for the members of my special education team! Half of them are pictured here (without the chocolate).


5:30 AM is going to come sooooooo quickly....