Pee happens

I was talking with a friend of mine over the weekend who admitted to drinking at least one can of soda each day at work (she's an accountant). "The only problem," she said, "is that I have to get up and pee a lot"

To which I replied: "Hey at least you have the luxury of peeing whenever you want to!"

You know, because I'm a teacher. And we have to wait until recess or our planning period or lunch to go pee.

I have this vision of what it's like to not be a teacher: you get expense accounts, an hour or two for lunch, and you can leave your office whenever you feel like peeing. No holding it!!

Then yesterday happened.

Yesterday was the state standardized test for our fourth graders. The rules for administering the test are taken very seriously. Like you have to go to special meetings, sign papers, vow not to do ANYTHING except stand there and monitor the students. Anyways, there were many special education students (including mine) testing out in the portable (there are five or six classrooms in ours). There are extra staff available in the hall to escort children who need to use the bathroom to and from the main building. They are also available to stand in for us should any of us teachers need to use the bathroom.

I've gone through this testing stuff before with my fifth graders at the beginning of the month. But this time was different. One of the staff, upon returning from the staff bathroom (which is located in the nurse's office) reported in hushed whispers that the nurse was MAKING TALLY MARKS for each time you left your room to use the bathroom.

TALLY MARKS. I'm assuming that this sheet of paper will get handed to the principal (who undoubtedly asked for it in the first place). And what will the principal do with it? Will she write us up for insufficient bladder control? Do we have a pee-pee quota I'm not aware of? Will she confiscate the pop in the vending machines? Will she make teachers start using a hall pass?

I think I'm going to be sick. But wait, that would mean running to the bathroom, which apparently is no longer allowed...

14 comments:

Jenny said...

Wow. Just wow.

alicia said...

Yeah, that's totally nuts!!

What next?

Anonymous said...

Drug testing...

TeachEnEspanol said...

That is completely ridiculous. Oh, and for your impending sickness, may I suggest the garbage can?

Anonymous said...

UNbelievable!!!!!!!

triciathomas said...

That is the craziest thing I have ever heard!!!

http://tricias-take.blogspot.com/

Mrs. K1 teacher said...

wow is an understatement. Im 95% sure that your administrators get to use the bathroom as their bodies dictate the need to do so.

On a personal note, I am currently 7 months pregnant and the staff bathroom is two full flights of stairs up. I asked for a key to use the bathroom in the nurse's office and my request was denied and then I was told I would have to PAY for the key. I am also needing to use the bathroom more frequently than normal and have received numerous comments about how often I need to use the bathroom.

Ridiculous!

Anonymous said...

I say, go often! High score wins, right?? Love ya, Brenda

The Goldfish Herder said...

That's just ridiculous!
I'm so glad I have my own bathroom in my portable, very handy.

Ellen Marie "Mama" Pike said...

How funny! I am a graphic artist who has been laid off a few times and in between jobs thought about being a substitute teacher. The bathroom thing killed the deal as I am always needing to go. I don't know how you teachers do it! LOL

Alice said...

Didn't you get the memo? You are supposed to conform. Tsk, tsk ...

Tanya said...

It is absurd that the nurse is even paying attention to who is going and who is not...

A 2 Z said...

Thank you, thank you, thank you for putting this out there. Most people do not understand what our lives are like. As a teacher we could run a few blogs together about the insanity of teaching with all its rules and regulations for teachers. I have not posted my award yet I'm ashamed to say. It will be posted very shortly. I'm in the middle of home renovations. Heeeeelp! My house is upside down!...

Karen@WaistingTime said...

Thanks for visiting my blog. I always wondered how teachers handled the whole need to pee thing.

Newer Posts Older Posts Home